Ask Ace Attorney: Wright Anything Agency Edition
by C.F.Winchester. Finalage
Summary: Ask any character a question, go on, ask them! Just...beware of their *answers* to you, ehh?
1. Rules to this Game

_Hmm, I was bored. Yes, that is the excuse. It's an excuse many have, so humor me…actually, no, I take that back. I did create this for a reason. My…OOC meter has been out-of-whack as of late, and I want it back in working order. That and I was curious. Oh, and keep in mind I own nothing here. ~Finalage_

**_+-~AAA~-+_**

**_Ask Ace Attorney: Wright Anything Agency Edition_**

**_+-~AAA~-+_**

Powered By: Alomegauge Productions

Well, maybe Finalage has gone mad. Hello Ace Attorney Fanatics, and welcome too…Ask Ace Attorney, as cliché as the name is…as you may have already surmised, this is one of those…"Post a question to a character.", rags that pop up every now and again, only I didn't see this type of rag here yet. So I tossed it in; how quaint of me.

Obviously, the rules for this are very simple. You review the story with a list of questions you'd like to ask this character or other, and I'll try my best to get the cast to answer you…in their typical whacky ways. Some answers may surprise you, others will be spot on, but you can be sure that the forth wall…is not only well painted but severely shattered with an assortment of large wrecking balls.

Some guidelines if you will:

1. If you wish to ask a question of a "dated" character, you must make a note of this. For example, is you wish to pose a question to the "Lawyer" Phoenix, say so, as opposed to asking the father Phoenix, or "Hobo" Phoenix, a question. The same stands true for Trucy and Ema, and I suppose Franziska, Miles Edgeworth and company.

2. Originally, I would have barred questioning from the Miles Edgeworth set of games, but now, since I have played the first. The restriction is only on the second, you know, the one with the weird floating logic chess pieces and-*further talk expunged for possible spoiler reasons*

3. Despite me being your host, there can be author cameos that will take the stage if they so desire…those will expressly PM me and discuss with me details on how their appearances will go down. Original characters of said authors are allowed to make cameos too, however…

3a. Cameos by original characters should be limited per chapter, and as per the agreement of authenticity, they should not be the target of questions, nor should they be the main focus of a chapter. The purpose of a cameo is to provide a certain atmosphere or amount of comic relief/fear for the main cast, or for promotional purposes.

4. This rag is also for requests. HOWEVER, abiding by the caps lock abuse law here…requests take a long time to fulfill. Much longer than the answering of questions do. Reason being is simple. When you ask a character a question, you are allowing them to answer in turn. Making a request requires me to pull out the old author's pen and create a whole chapter, which takes a lot more planning than the simple natural logic and personality analysis born from questions.

5. Obviously, you may ask more than one question, and of more than one character, within one post, and you can ask more questions latter on if you so desire, simply review again.

6. Unlike most Question and Answer fictions that I have seen, I like to put effort into background and character reactions, this means that the format will look more like a story than a survey, so bear with me, I do it all for qualities sake.

7. Characters retain the right to deny answering a question if they so desire, however, I won't use this as a lazy card. I'll only employ this right if I feel the question is really something that the characters themselves would refuse to answer…so don't piss them off!

Finally…your questions do not only have to get reactions from one character. You can be certain that there will be banter and interaction between those present in the "room" so be wary of that too. You wouldn't want Franziska randomly pulling out that oh so supple length of whip against another character…would you?

Actually, I take that back…you would want that, wouldn't you?

Ahh, a final side note. I, your host, am Alexander Lexicon; however, my purpose is nothing large in this piece. I am part comic relief and part mouth piece for the fool who writes this. As a cameo, I am currently breaking the rules by being the main focal point in a chapter. This is perhaps not the only time this will happen, so pardon me.

So, how do you write a request letter?

Well, here is a sample letter, with a few questions stamped on for kicks.

_**Test Reviewer Wrote: **_

_Am I starting this off? That's surprising…hmmm…well; I guess I want to ask Hobo Nick a question. It's about your hat…did Trucy make that for you, or was it bought? _

_I guess I'll toss a question at Edgeworth too…tell me honestly, was there ever a person you were interrogating that tried to distract you…"unprofessionally"?_

Looking at the letter, I already had a feeling for what was going to happen, but, the first question was innocent enough so…I let the letter hang slackly on the tips of my fingers. Indicating my head in Phoenix's direction, I tossed him the scrap, which he caught and dutifully read; he was sprawled lazily on his own couch, in control.

"Ha. Well-"

I had to still his mouth here, pointing to the offending piece of technology near me. The man operating it moved closer, and I glared at him. He'd already had me bang my forehead on that demonic microphone of his twice, I didn't need another round.

"Into the camera if you will; Mr. Wright."

The man took a quick glance to make sure his daughter wasn't present before he gave a smirk at the lens.

"Right…well yeah. Trucy made this hat for me when she was about…well, not quite ten. She was really excited to give it to me, if I remember right…it was for Father's day you see, and she had been jumping around like some kind of Texas bean all day. I could tell instantly she made it for herself, after all, I've never seen anything like it in the stores near, and the sewing was bunched in some places…but hey, that made it all the warmer…we have a kind of promise behind it, so I don't like taking it off much, if you don't mind."

"No one said they did, Mr. Wright."

"Yo. Edgeworth, catch."

Phoenix threw the letter, but Edgeworth, who had been absorbed in something else, looked up a bit too late.

"Catch what Wright-gah! Wright! This is…one of those things…already? May I pass this reading?"

"Better take the harmless ones first Edgeworth; you'll need to save that refusal of yours for something really hairy…"

"Wright, I have better things to do than answer some silly fan mail-"

"Right now, Edgeworth? We've got nothing better to do. Might as well answer the question. It isn't all that bad."

"…Was there ever a person you were interrogating that tried to distract you…"unprofessionally"…?"

"Yep."

"You mean besides the usual fare of…"…characters…" I have to deal with?"

Phoenix looked off out into space for the span of a few seconds. Edgeworth wasn't amused.

"Wright."

"The question doesn't specify Edgeworth."

"I demand a specification!"

"You're being unreasonable Edgeworth…besides; you can't squeeze testimony out of a piece of paper. Interpret."

In truth, Edgeworth didn't even want to be in this room at the moment, let alone answering questions about his life. Still, Wright was correct, so Edgeworth…interpreted. His arms folded across his chest and his eyes shut for a few seconds while his finger tapped out a beat against his elbow. He spoke in this manner to the open air; the cameraman had to go to him.

"Well of course there were people who, during interrogation, tried to distract me unprofessionally, not the least of which was Calisto Yew, what with her habit of pointing a loaded gun at somebody when I corner her…twice! First myself and then Kay, quite unprofessional, wouldn't you say, Wright?"

"… I think the question meant something else, but I suppose you're right…and I did say interpret. Way to take the snake's route there, Edgeworth..."

**+-~E~-+**

_Well, there is no guarantee that each question will receive such emphasis (may be more, may be less), but to be sure, I'm not going to have characters answer you in a blank space._

_Oh, on a side note, I will have my next chapter in my other Ace Attorney fiction up soon, I'm just dissatisfied with OOC'ness, and thus, this was born to give me a more rooted understanding of the character's I am trying to portray. I think Edgeworth is off here, but hey, I'm trying to fine tune my knowledge of how characters act here, so they are going to be off while I adjust. ~Finalage_


	2. Starting Line

_Ahh well, I suppose we start off with a measured pace and see where we go…Oh, of course, I don't own anything. ~Finalage._

**+~-AAA-~+**

**Installment Two: Starting Line.**

**+~-AAA-~+**

"Oi! Mail's here!"

Glancing up from my writing, I receive a letter right in my face. Cursed mail carrier and his habit of throwing mail under the door…how does he manage to make it hit people's face anyway?.! It must be some form of jujutsu he pulls off…Don't go there Alexander…don't.

Gods, I am trying to rewrite my thesis on the effect of juries on the court system and rulings for Pete's sake! Can not a judge live his life in peace…ahh? It's one of _those_ pieces of mail. Ahh well, best call the gang. Huh…It's addressed to a large cast of people, but it's quite thin…I wonder why…

Sighing, I look to my thesis with dismay. Not today.

"Mr. Edgeworth, Wright…Justice and Madam Faraday, Wright and…Fey? Ahh! Seems like we must pull back a few covers here, Mr. Wright! I'm going to have to ask you to come with me…no, no, we need the past you… you see…"

It was soon set up as it was needed. Crowded on the couch and the floor, (Phoenix and Apollo being those forced to there…), the crew of Apollo, Trucy, Edgeworth, Kay and Maya jostled for places on the couch. Phoenix looked at Trucy strangely, as if he had never seen her before…which wasn't far from the truth, but hey…

"Whoa, Charlie's pretty big! …and If I'm right and that's Trucy…where am I? What year is this and-"

"Silence, Phoenix. Please. You will only make your brain throb. This is a space outside time. So kindly shut up and pay attention. I called you all here because I have a letter here, and it's sent by express…meaning it's urgent. Let us see…"

_**(Spadework2 ) "A Trapped Man." Wrote: **_

_I need an answer from Edgeworth, Kay, Phoenix, Maya, Apollo and Trucy urgently. I know this may seem strange and silly but bare with me._

Me and my flatmate were having a much over due spring clean. During this clean she told me to pass over the ladder near me. I, quite correctly, pointed out that it was a step-ladder. Cue the most stupid arguement ever to be produced in mankinds history which has climaxed with her blocking me into my room...with step-ladders.

Can you fine, intelligent people tell me once and for all who is correct?

From

_**~ A Trapped Man.**_

Swallowing, I look up at the crew in front of me, dreading the outcome of this…obvious bomb. Phoenix seemed to have horror etched into every line of his face, "It back!" was clearly written there. He gave a quick look at who was behind him, and was unsure to find that it was Trucy. He didn't know her opinion on the matter but…at least he wasn't face to face with Maya…

"…Objection! That letter is full of typos!"

"Edgeworth…Stop being such a grammar Nazi."

"Objection! My comment is based on spelling, not in grammar Wright! Besides, the object is obviously a ladder. It makes no difference what kind of ladder it is; a ladder is essentially a ladd-"

"Objection! Makes no difference Edgeworth? Are you trying to say that there would be no difference then, between a curved dagger and a straight one? For I'll tell you something Edgeworth! They may both be daggers, but only one could be the right murder weapon!"

"Grk! ...Wright…the conversation is about ladders, not knives!"

"Objection! The same principle applies! Suppose it was a step ladder that was the murder weapon Miles. Is it not true that such a thing has a larger mass and weight and thus more momentum than an ordinary ladder? Would you still fail to distinguish the two? I. Don't. Think. So!"

"Uhh…Objection?"

"Huh…? Oh…hi…you are…?"

Apollo felt like evaporating right there, or dropping dead. Was Mr. Wright serious?.!

"I'm your apprentice Mr. Wright…and I don't really see the point in their being a difference…they both are ladders-"

"Objection! Apprentice?.! Wait…whaa? Since when…."

"Polly! It does make a difference! Its two ladders stuck together! It's a completely different tool-"

"Ob-jec-tion! You are essentially say that's it's just two ladders stuck together. That does not warrant a "new tool" at all!

"Oi, Mail!"

"Well, technically, it is a step-ladder, right Mr. Edgeworth?"

"I thought we were not going to discuss this, Kay…"

"What?.! Oh come on, everybody else is having fun with it…"

"…Fun?"

Again, Alexander turned around, and received a letter right in-between his eyes. Gah! That mail carrier boy…he was inhuman! But…this gave him the chance he was hoping for. The man grabbed his thesis and slipped out of the room while the argument continued behind him, his eyes glancing at the letter in his hands.

Oooh boy…this was not going to be pretty. He had to go back and get the current Phoenix Wright…him and Franziska, along with Pearl…in a room with the current crowd…*sigh* Why was he given this job? He didn't go to law school for this…this wasn't part of the job description!

Back to the room at hand…

Maya had joined in on the argument, banking herself against Trucy, who stood by her name of "Wright" in term of stubbornness. Edgeworth, after his original gusto, had realized that he was arguing with Wright about the proper terminology for a_ ladder_, which promptly took the wind out of his sails…but still…it was a ladder.

"Objection! It is a Step-ladder, as per its given name. Can you not see that?"

"Objection! Ladder! You still have yet to show me a significant difference that would quantify the need to use a different name!"

"Oh? Well mister apprentice, consider this. The name "step-ladder" comes from its resemblance to a pair of steps! It is a folding "A" shape that allows you to reach greater heights! A simple ladder is just a "I" shaped structure with rungs that allow you to scale something by leaning the ladder against it! Step ladders are, in a word….Independent!"

This was coming from Phoenix, complete with a rear back of his powerful finger, and a savage point that sent his opponent sprawling away, because that finger was simply waaay to close for comfort…eye-poking-like close.

"Gah!"

Yet, Phoenix had no time to celebrate his victory, because the battle field was still raging. And now he had to face his ultimate-

"Yo."

*Shh-NAP*

_Shiiii****!_

Alexander entered the room, a young Pearl behind him. After hearing an earful from "the management" about trying to find the present Pearl, he found himself back here, and facing a bunch of glowering eyes.

"Okay, okay. You want to know what I think? I honestly call the accursed thing a ladder, regardless-"

"HA!"

"Ahh! Let me finish! Yet. It is the politically and truthfully correct terminology to call that same blasted thing a step-ladder if it is one. So you know what? I sent the poor bloke a rope ladder and some dynamite and told him he was right, but it doesn't matter. Let him find his own way out. We have company and another letter people!"

Phoenix pointed at the beanie wearing man who had first spoken. His words were like a knife without knowing.

"Who's the Hobo?"

Trucy fixed the back of the spikey haired man's head with a stunned look. Her beanie wearing father just laughed to himself. Ahh, if only the poor fellow knew what was coming to him! Maybe he should enlighten him…Alexander beat him to it though.

"That's future you. Now, letter!"

It took a few seconds of incredulity for the blue suited Phoenix to let that statement sink in, and when Alexander began reading the letter, he only had one comment to make…

"…**OBJECTION!"**

_**override7400 (Jello) Wrote:  
><strong>_

_Hm... I do believe that I have to try this. So..._

First, I think I'm going to ask "Hobo" Wright something...

Would you consider yourself a hobo? And how are you making any money?

Ok, Edgeworth's turn now.

I would like to ask you about Franziska. Tell me, why do you and everyone else let her whip you all so much?

Finally, Wright, Edgeworth, Maya, Franziska, and Pearl.

...

What's your favorite colors?

Thanks to everyone!

_**~Jello**_

"Mr. Wright, you're up!"

Both men looked up, but the older Nick sent a glare at the other that stilled his younger counter part's mouth. He plopped himself down so that his elbow dug into the head of the couch, and he himself sat on the arm, near Trucy.

"I just hope I don't get nightmares about my own eyes now…anyway…Nah. I don't consider myself a hobo…mainly because I've got a home to get to, but also because I do keep a job. I mean, Money's always tight, but The Borsht Bowl _does_ pay…if not so much for my pianist skills as they do for my poker ones…but hey…I help them when stock comes in and since I always leave late, I close up shop and do night inventories every once and a while…I've also got a responsibility in Trucy here, so that keeps me grounded…maybe…though sometimes it's more symbiosis than anything else…or parasitic…on my end."

"Daddy, don't say that…"

"T-Tha-THAT BUM is supposed to be ME-"

"Wright, control yourself!"

I looked to Edgeworth, who had made that statement. He was burning holes in Phoenix's suit with his eyes.

"Mr. Edgeworth…burn some holes in this letter instead of your colleague if you will, you have something here to answer…"

"I refuse!"

"… … …You haven't even read it yet."

"I still refuse! I can see it from here! I refuse to answer such a languid question as that!"

Slumping his shoulders, Alexander fixed him with a death glare of his own.

"Pray tell Mr. Edgeworth, what denizen from the godforsaken deep will swallow you if you answer this question?"

"…Please…may I take a rain check…?"

"Miles Edgeworth…"

"I would like to enter a formal plea for my mother!"

"… Your _what_ now?"

"…My mother. I will need her after this, I assure you."

Effectively face palming himself with enough force to knock over a cart horse, Alexander simply let his hands slide off his face, distorting it while he held out the letter. His voice was garbled as he spoke because of this.

"Read and don't refuse all willy-nilly…"

"…_**I would like to ask you about Franziska. Tell me, why do you and everyone else let her whip you all so much…?"**_

"I still want to refuse to answer this…"

"Ha. Let Me whip him? Fool! If one deserves punishment, then they receive it! There is no let, there is only perfection! If this fool thinks that my little brother can stop me from disciplining him, then they shall think again with that foolish head of theirs! Observe!"

*Snap! Snap SNAP SNAP WHIP SHH-urk.*

"What?.! How dare you! Unhand me at once you fool!"

Phoenix, the one with the beanie, had snaked out his arm when the whip came to close to him and Trucy, catching the smooth head of the whip in his closed fist and holding it in there.

"Last time I checked Franziska, I wasn't holding unto you at all, it was simply this thing; that was getting to close to my daughter and I. Be careful where you direct that anger of yours. You said you wanted to punish Miles, not everybody in the room."

Phoenix let go of the whip and allowed it to snap back to its owner. The younger form of himself looked at him as if he were mad.

"What?.! Are you insane…? She'll kill him!"

"Hmph…Insolent…fool. *Smack!*"

"Yeeeeooooow!"

"Oh…so that's where I got those marks from…"

"Ahh, why don't we just all get along and…Ahh! I see!"

Alexander dodged two flashed of the whip that were headed his way and when he saw that this angered Franziska, stayed still long enough to catch the cord, which didn't help her mood any, even if he loosed it almost instantly.

"Now, we have the rest of this letter too…ahh! Yes…my…hey, aren't you a little. Slow! Yes. Slow! Madam. Germans are not Gods! Cool Your head! Aye! ...Onwards then.

"Fools tomfoolery of a fool that knows no shame but to avoid his fate like the-"

"Fool that he foolishly is? Please Madam, before I penalize you…kindly shut your mouth."

"Urk….Fool…!" *Snap!*

"Agh!" _Why must it always be me to bear the brunt of your storms Franziska?_

"So Miles Edgeworth, I assume you are still avoiding this question…"

The prosecutor fixed him with a look that clearly stated how he felt at the moment, and what he thought of this mans continued dogged determination into a dark cell of facts that Edgeworth did not want to indulge him in exploring as company. Sighing, Lexicon shook his head.

"So be it. Wright, Edgeworth, Maya and Pearl Fey, Von Karma! The question is…what is your favorite color?.! …Such a…simple request."

Both Phoenix's answered at once. Funny though, they both said different colors. The younger Lawyer claimed blue as his favorite, but the older Phoenix claimed red as his favorite. Filing away the change for further analysis, Lexicon turned to Edgeworth.

"Ahh…isn't it obvious? A deep wine red is a color I quite enjoy. It reminds me of vitality as well as quality."

Franziska muttered the word: "Green." under her breath, almost as if she were ashamed of it. When Alexander turned his back however, she tried to snap at him with her whip, but she missed his quick gait, and when he turned around…she was as if she had not moved. Maya's turn.

"Silver! It's sleek and shiny and doesn't get messed up by other colors. It reminds me of the Steel Samurai too…"

Pearl had perhaps been the only quiet one up to this point, so she had been largely left to her own devices, these mainly being sticking next to Maya. However, she did have a voice, and she used it when her turn came.

"Blue like the sky…it's light though, so it would be…"

"Baby or light blue, Pearls…"

"Baby Blue then."

**+~-E-~+**

*Sigh* Well, there's the first round then. This turned out kind of odd. Hey. I'm still trying to sync with this cast of characters, but I can identify right away that Franziska is weak here. Oddly speaking, my own OC is weak here, though he should be…his character isn't quite right here…Wow. How can you get an _OC_ wrong? That's an accomplishment! …One you should never be proud of. Pearl said nothing, thus what she has is weak. Maya said little, so she's _helluva_ out of character. Damn, Kay barely anything either. Ahh well, I can't get everybody in, can't I?

Well, tell me what you think here. I'm still recalibrating this thing I call a head here. ~Finalage.


End file.
